I have been told that I trigger people with my writing and speaking. And let’s make something clear: that is never my intent. I never stand up in front of people or sit behind the keyboard and think about how to trigger someone. In fact, I soften my language quite frequently so people aren’t triggered. Nonetheless, people say I trigger them. Well, this is incorrect. They’re placing blame on me for their triggers. I didn’t trigger you, your brain and trauma did. It’s not my fault you were triggered.
Lately, I’ve been wondering why I can’t get over fatphobia. I’ve gotten over so much bad programming in my life, I would have thought I could have gotten over that toxic set of ideas as well, but it seems I just can’t. Ideas of fatphobia just seem to own my brain. Skinny is good; fat is bad. Skinny is lovable; fat is unlovable. Skinny is beautiful; fat is ugly. And so on and so on. My own fatphobia is shocking to me. But if I realize I don’t want to be this way, why can’t I get over fatphobia?
Bipolar disorder is not your fault. Schizophrenia is not your fault. Depression is not your fault. You did nothing to deserve a mental illness. You are a good person and your being sick does not affect that. Mental illness landed on you and started eating away at your brain. It could have happened to anyone. You had nothing to do with it. Mental illness is not your fault.
Our society encourages people to push their limits, and there is no out for people with mental illness. Our society claims over and over that we must “push the envelope,” “take risks,” and “do what scares us.” There is no societal pressure to “respect your limits” or “live the way you feel comfortable.” And maybe that’s good for the general population, I can’t say, but what I can say is that it’s terrible advice for people with mental illness. With serious mental illness, pushing your limits is a mistake.
Can a doctor have a good bedside manner and be medically competent? That is the question. In my experience, these two things rarely go together. This is a shame because I consider them two sides of the same coin when treating patients. You can’t just be good at one of them and expect to get the best possible outcomes. And I’m not the only one who says this, research bears this out as well (see more below). So why do doctors who are clinically competent rarely have a good bedside manner and vice versa? Do we really have to choose between the two?
Anxiety is such a common thing during this time of year, but you can beat anxiety during the holidays. I know things like parties, family, entertaining, and all the other things associated with the holidays can be anxiety-inducing for people — me too. Just thinking about my family sitting in my apartment while I stress about making Christmas dinner is freaking me out. And while we’re not all the same, I do believe there are some techniques we can all try to beat anxiety over the holidays.
Trigger warnings don’t work. I know that’s a controversial statement as trigger warnings have crept into seemingly all aspects of media. But trigger warnings did this without anyone studying the effects of including a trigger warning. People started including them with good intentions, but that doesn’t mean including them actually produces positive responses. Here, I’m going to outline how we’ve learned that trigger warnings don’t work to help people feel less traumatized and, in fact, can have negative effects.
Mental illness can prevent daily hygiene. I’ve been a victim of this and so have so many other people. Some people have come to me in confidence and said that they can’t brush their teeth and it’s causing major dental problems. Other people have said, in hushed tones, that they can’t do their laundry so they don’t leave their houses. These kinds of hygiene tasks are just too hard for some people disabled with serious mental illnesses. So, let’s talk about how mental illness can prevent daily hygiene. Let’s bring this subject out of the closet and into the light.
A major refrain in the mental health world is that stigma prevents people from seeking mental health care, and that’s why we need all these anti-stigma campaigns and programs. Well, the actual facts beg to differ. While stigma may prevent mental health care in a minority of cases, there are far bigger reasons why people who need care don’t get it. This begs the following questions: Why are advocates always harping on about stigma? Why are there so many anti-stigma campaigns? What would really help people with mental illness get mental health care?
I’ve always said there isn’t a diet that treats bipolar disorder. This is still true. Nonetheless, there is a diet that may be best for mental illness and cognitive decline; it’s called the MIND diet. Few people have heard of the Mediterranean-DASH dietintervention forneurodegenerativedelay (MIND) diet, and it is a work in progress, but the MIND diet outlines a broad eating plan that, according to research, can help your brain function at its best and slow cognitive decline. Diets have been the object of various studies, including in people with mental illness, those who have had a stroke, and those at risk of Alzheimer’s.
I’ve experienced hypersexuality as part of bipolar disorder. Now, I’m not one to run about and have sex with everything that moves (but it’s okay if you are), so, luckily, this symptom of bipolar has not hurt me (although it has affected me). That said, hypersexuality is a real bipolar symptom with real consequences for people. One of the problems with hypersexuality, though, is that it is about sex. People have issues talking openly about sex, particularly in a sex-positive way. But this isn’t helpful to those who have experienced hypersexuality. So, for a moment, let’s openly talk about hypersexuality — just another bipolar symptom.
Yesterday, I was asked how I know what is bipolar and what is me. As in, when I’m having a thought, emotion, or impulse, how do I know which of those things is coming from the bipolar disorder and which are genuinely me? This is not a simple question. The edges between me and the bipolar disorder are fuzzy. Bipolar disorder can be very loud and overtake my own voice. And while I’m sure I don’t get it right 100 percent of the time, I do know what is bipolar and what is me.
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