Tag: depression

When it Comes to Mental Illness and Depression, Stigma Kills

The Bipolar Burble welcomes guest author Joshua R Beharry, a Vancouver, B.C., Canada-based mental health advocate.

I developed depression in silence.

I remember the months before I became severely depressed; it was the summer of 2009. Deadlines at work had me more stressed than usual and I was increasingly unhappy with my lack of social life. I noticed my thoughts becoming more erratic and desperate but I didn’t know what this meant or where it could lead. I was 22 years old.

When anyone asked how I was doing, I lied and said I was fine. I didn’t tell anyone I wasn’t sleeping well, that my appetite was down or that I felt weaker and more tired than normal.

I saw mental illness only as a label and I didn’t want to admit I may be having issues with my own mental health. I didn’t know enough about depression to see all the warning signs. I kept silent as my thoughts grew darker and I began to fantasize about ending my life.

Depression Overwhelmed Me

I remember the night I realized I could no longer hide my depressed thoughts. I lay in bed unable to fall asleep, my stomach cramped. I felt hot, sweaty and nauseous. It was one of the longest nights of my life.

Read More

Creating Art through the Manias and Depressions of Bipolar Disorder

The Bipolar Burble blog welcomes guest author somePlaywrights, a collaboration of two writers based in Annapolis and Brooklyn, who face, seemingly weekly, a struggle to succeed as a creative, bipolar collaboration.

On its own, the practice of creating art is bizarre: fusing this abstract feeling with that concrete image, trying to convince others of something only you can see, and all the while endeavoring to balance concept with content. With the addition of bipolar disorder, a condition that is just as, if not more, slippery, firm, and fleeting, the artistic process often teeters between genius and delusion, between coherence and disunion. It is in this realm, where mania meets medium and depression intersects with artistic production, that we, as bipolar artists, must carve and claim our collective space…

Read More

How to Keep a Bipolar Blog Running During the Depressed Times

Note: For this post I used Grammarly’s grammar correction feature because writing without good grammar is like skydiving without a parachute: you don’t need good grammar to be hired as a writer; you need good grammar to be hired as a writer twice.

I’m a bipolar writer. This is not news to anyone. As a person with bipolar disorder, I naturally have good days and bad days. Specifically, I naturally have average days and horrifically depressed days. And it impresses people that the Bipolar Burble blog manages to stay running through it all. Every week I get one or two posts up no matter what.

So people have asked me, how the heck do you do that? How do you keep a (popular) bipolar blog going through the depressed times?

Read More

Surviving Depression and Death of a Loved One

Today the Bipolar Burble is pleased to welcome author and speaker Hyla Molander. Hyla talks today about how she survived the death of her husband while already dealing with depression. Hyla is currently working on a memoir about her experiences. Check out her Kickstarter campaign.

Taking Zoloft throughout my second pregnancy was a decision my husband, Erik, and I made together. We’d sat with the genetic counselor and had come to the conclusion that my mental stability far outweighed the risks for the baby.

Of course, this was ten years ago—long before there was research on how Zoloft affects the foetus.

I’d been on and off of antidepressants for almost a decade. During those off times, I’d snap at Erik.  “Quit touching me. Quit telling me how great you think I am.”

After I repeatedly tried to sabotage our relationship, we finally agreed that I should stay on my meds. Popping that pill meant choosing happiness.

Depression and Death

Then, on Easter Sunday, 2003—a day that had begun with Erik and I discussing how blessed we were—our 17 month old daughter and I watched as he slid down the kitchen counter and died.

At 29 years old, Erik’s heart flicked off like a switch.

Read More

I’m Not Myself Today – Feeling Bad About Feeling Bad

As I’ve mentioned before, people with bipolar disorder, statistically, spend more time depressed than they do manic or hypomanic. People with bipolar II have it the worst. People with bipolar II can spend up to 35 times more time depressed than hypomanic. This means that if you’re a symptomatic bipolar II, you’re probably feeling depressed right now.

And, of course, depression is a big problem in bipolar disorder as there are only two Food and Drug Administration-approved treatments for bipolar depression (although other treatments are prescribed off label).

While that picture is dark, I would argue there is one aspect of depression that’s more within our control but is equally debilitating. It’s (often obsessively) feeling bad about feeling bad.

Read More

The Separation of Depression and Bipolar in the New DSM-5

The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (the DSM) is frequently called psychiatry’s “bible.” I, however, would not pen it that way. I would suggest that the DSM is simply a guideline for the diagnosis of mental illness. It lists the criteria one has to have in order to be diagnosed with a mental illness.

And, as the name of this post suggests, the DSM is releasing its fifth major version – the DSM-5 – in just a couple of weeks.

Now, the DSM-5 has been controversial from the get-go and I have said that much of this controversy is overstated, but some of the changes do have fundamental nosological implications. In other words, some of the changes in the DSM-5 can change how people fundamentally think of certain mental illnesses.

The DSM-5 Cuts the Chord between Depression and Bipolar

And one of the changes in the DSM-5 is the separation of major depression and bipolar disorder into their own chapters. No longer is there a chapter called “Mood Disorders” with both disorder types listed (Can we still call them mood disorders?). Now they each represent a separate category.

This may seem like a small change, and I’m not going to have a fit over it, but I will say that I think it was the wrong move.

Read More

How to Tell Someone You’re Feeling Suicidal Pt. 2

Last time I talked about feeling suicidal and who to tell if you’re feeling suicidal. This time I talk about how to tell someone you’re feeling suicidal.

How to Tell Someone You’re Feeling Suicidal

If you’re telling a professional, it’s actually not that hard. Just come straight out and tell them. Don’t dance around it and try not to be afraid because they’ve heard the words, “I’m suicidal,” so many more times than you can imagine. They know those words and they know what to do with them. Remember, you can’t get help and you can’t feel better if you don’t tell anyone.

Read More
Get Natasha Tracy's Book

Subscribe to the Burble via Email

Additional Writings

Check out my Amazon Author Page.

I write a three-time Web Health Award winning column for HealthyPlace called Breaking Bipolar.

Also, find my writings on The Huffington Post and my work for BPHope (BP Magazine).

Archives

Subscribe for a FREE EBook!

Subscribe for a FREE EBook!

Subscribe to my monthly newsletter to get the latest from Bipolar Burble, Breaking Bipolar, my vlogs at bpHope, my masterclasses, and other useful tidbits -- plus get a FREE eBook on coping skills.

Thank you for subscribing. Look for an email to complete your subscription.