Bipolar blog Archives - Page 4 of 82 - Natasha Tracy Bipolar Expert

I Never Stop Crying — Depression

Posted by Natasha Tracy | Dec 8, 2022

I never stop crying. I can understand why you might think this isn’t true. After all, my cheeks are dry right now. But, believe me, I never stop crying, whether it’s external or suppressed enough to be internal. I have found depression can be like that. No matter what is happening — good or bad — the tears are always there. The depression is always there. It’s bigger than me. it’s stronger than me. And make no mistake; it is also trying to kill me. The omnipresent tears are merely a warning sign.

Finding the Right Mental Health App for You

Posted by Natasha Tracy | Nov 8, 2022

Finding the right mental health app in a sea of 10,000 estimated health and wellness apps available (yes, there are really that many) can bring its own challenges. Moreover, in my opinion, it’s the Wild West out there for freely available online apps. This is because anyone can create an app and say it’s good for mental wellness with limited proof to support that claim. So, how do you find the right mental health app for you? At a recent BlogHer Health panel sponsored by Otsuka, we got the 411 on some things to consider.

Is Bipolar a Punishment from God?

Posted by Natasha Tracy | Nov 2, 2022

Believe me, when I tell you bipolar disorder can absolutely feel like a punishment from God (or the universe, or bad karma, etc.) It doesn’t even matter if you believe in any particular god; bipolar disorder can feel like a punishment nonetheless. But why does bipolar disorder feel like a punishment from God, and what can we do about it?

Stop Telling Me I’m Not Crazy — A Bipolar Mixed Mood and Hiding Insanity

Posted by Natasha Tracy | Oct 20, 2022

The following is indicative of a mixed mood. These are not necessarily my exact thoughts when I’m thinking more clearly.

It’s days like today when I’d like to punch anyone in the face who says I’m not crazy. I’m crazy. I’m CRAY-ZEE. I know you can’t see it, but if you were in my brain right now, it would be crystal clear to you. I’m feeling so crazy, in fact, that I suspect another person would think they were psychotic if they had to deal with the brain I currently have. I know this is not psychosis, though. I know this is a brutal, unfair, horrific bipolar mixed mood.

Self-Harm Myth: People Who Self-Harm Like Pain

Posted by Natasha Tracy | Oct 13, 2022

It sounds true, but it’s actually a myth that people who self-harm like pain. I’ve done it; I should know. That’s right — I’ve purposefully caused pain, and yet, I hate pain. Believe me, you can want to self-injure and hate pain — both of those things can be true at the same time. Read on to learn about the myth that those who self-mutilate like pain.

Spending on Genetic-Drug Interaction Tests for Antidepressant Choice? Think Twice

Posted by Natasha Tracy | Sep 29, 2022

Have you heard of a medical test for the selection of antidepressants? It’s billed as a simple blood test or cheek swab that can indicate what antidepressant you should or should not take. This is advertised as “personalized medicine” or “precision medicine.” And to anyone who has been on the (un)merry-go-round of antidepressant trials, it sure sounds like a great idea. Here’s the latest research on what you need to know about spending money on medical tests for antidepressant selection.

No One Would Want Me If They Knew the Real Disabled Me

Posted by Natasha Tracy | Sep 15, 2022

I have thought that no one would want me if they knew the real me for, oh, my whole life. It’s not because I’m an ax-murderer or puppy-hater or anything; it’s just because I’m me, and “me” is very messy, indeed. The inner life of a bipolar can be torture. And then there’s whatever Natasha has to offer on top of it. And then there’s Ehler’s-Danlos. And then there’s fibromyalgia. And, really, I thought no one would want me before those last two really asserted themselves, so I can only imagine how undesirable I am now. But one thing I know is that many people think that no one would want them if they knew the real them. Specifically, I know that many disabled people think that no one would want them if they knew the real them. But do disabilities — bipolar disorder or otherwise — stand in the way of being desirable?

For When I’m Suicidal; For When You’re Suicidal

Posted by Natasha Tracy | Sep 5, 2022

Dear Suicidal Friend,

This sucks. Okay, it doesn’t just suck. It’s horrendous. It’s horrific. It’s soul-sucking. It’s suicidality at its finest. It’s lonely, and the pain is unbearable. I know what that feels like. I have been there many times before. I know how impossible just one more moment in the muck and mire feels. I have written about suicide over and over and over, and yet it doesn’t stop me from feeling suicidal again. It doesn’t stop me from wanting to kill myself. No amount of knowledge takes away the suffering.

When You Don’t Want to Take Your Bipolar Medication — Battling Noncompliance

Posted by Natasha Tracy | Aug 11, 2022

Recently I was asked what to do when you don’t want to take your bipolar medication. What do you do when you’re battling medication noncompliance (also known as nonadherence) within yourself? I thought this was a good question as it’s something that many of us battle with. We know we need to take the medication, but some part of us doesn’t want to take the medication. I guess it’s a need vs. want scenario. This scenario is trickier than many people think, as not wanting to take medication is common and a very understandable impulse. So here’s what to do when you don’t want to take your bipolar medication.