Mental illness is considered an invisible illness and that’s because there are many mental illness symptoms you can’t see. In fact, most of the worst symptoms of many mental illnesses can’t be seen. This causes many problems for people with mental illness. Because mental illness symptoms can’t be seen they’re often not thought of as real – but mental illness symptoms are as real as the pain of a two-by-four to the head, trust me.
Childhood bipolar disorder is a scary proposition and that’s what makes the treatment of bipolar disorder in children so critical. I recently came across a Psychiatric Times article by Chris Aiken, MD that talks about treating children with bipolar disorder with lithium and I wanted to outlay the research findings Dr. Aiken talks about as well as my own thoughts.
Some would argue trauma can cause bipolar disorder. I would argue bipolar itself, feels like a trauma. I’m not suggesting bipolar disorder de facto gives you posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD), but I am saying the trauma reactions seen in trauma survivors are similar to what I experience with chronic, obstructive, severe bipolar disorder.
On Sunday, a mentally ill man ran down a family with his truck as they innocently rolled down a bike lane. There was no previous connection between the man and the family. The man with the mental illness spontaneously ran them down; the father suffered with fatal wounds while his two sons watched. The father was Pedro Aguerreberry of Tampa Florida and the man with mental illness was Mikese Morse. This is one in an unending series of tragedies that result from untreated/improperly treated serious mental illness.
Doctors are sometimes dismissive of you when you have bipolar disorder. Believe me, this is true. Most of us have seen the “dismissive doctor” phenomenon firsthand. And not only are general practitioners often dismissive of bipolar patients but so are specialists and most everyone else in the medical profession (especially in the emergency department of a hospital). This isn’t all doctors, of course, many of us know great ones, but many of us also have also had legitimate medical concerns dismissed because of our bipolar disorder.
It’s important to know that you can, and should, call or text a hotline (formally known in the U.S. as Lifeline) even if you’re not suicidal but are experiencing emotional distress. I’m serious about this. You don’t have to wait until you’re on death’s door to talk to a professional crisis worker. Yes, I know their title is “crisis” worker but really what they are is educated people that are there to help you when you need help – whether you’re formally in a “crisis” or not. In fact, calling or texting a hotline, Lifeline, when you’re not suicidal might be the best thing you can do to save your own life.
Last week, Kanye West released his new album Ye, and with it, the information (confirmation, really) that he has bipolar disorder. And Kanye West doesn’t just say he has bipolar disorder, he screams in his album all about it including:
“Ain’t no disability! I’m a superhero. I’m a SUPERHERO!”
Bipolar disorder also features prominently on Kanye West’s album cover which reads:
“I hate being bi-polar [sic] it’s awesome.”
One of the things that drives me crazy is that there is no “right way” to deal with bipolar disorder. There is no “right” treatment, there is no “right” therapy, there no “right” anything when it comes to bipolar disorder. When I look at the roadmap of my past treatment, it is so winding that this is clear. And the thing that really gets me is when I look at my future treatment roadmap, I see that uncertainty too. It makes it so hard to make a decision when there is no right way to deal with bipolar disorder.
In my experience, there are often times when bipolar depression makes it so that I can’t do anything. I’m a lump. A rock. A blob. I literally can’t do anything because of bipolar depression. And because this happens to me, quite frankly, on a not infrequent basis, I’ve learned what to do when bipolar depression makes it so that I can’t do anything.
Desperation is one of the effects of bipolar disorder. In fact, desperation is even one of the effects of bipolar disorder treatment (Bipolar Treatment Fatigue). So many of us with bipolar disorder have felt desperate at one or more points in time; bipolar disorder is even making some of us feel desperate right now.
I cry all the time. Like, all the time. Crying is, in fact, my reaction to virtually everything (Depression and Crying in Public). Music makes me cry, TV shows make me cry, thoughts make me cry and even silence, makes me cry. If I sit here and just honestly think about how I feel in this very moment, I cry. I just always feel like crying. Crying is my reaction to everything. It’s wet, it’s salty and it sucks.
There are different types of suicidal depressions and one type is the passive suicidal depression. It’s the kind of suicidal depression where you want to die, you just don’t want to kill yourself. (As I’ve written about before, here: The Difference Between Being Suicidal and Wanting to Die.) Passive suicidal depression tends to take forms such as the very common one of not wanting to wake up in the morning.
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