Many of us hear condescending, stigmatizing, and prejudicial remarks about bipolar disorder in the workplace – a place where everyone should be treated with respect and as an equal. This led one reader to ask me this question (reprinted with permission):
I’m not sure how to deal with an incident at work. The company brought in a trainer who when talking about difficult coworkers said “for example have you ever worked with someone who is bipolar.” I spoke with him afterwards and he said he meant to say when unmedicated. I’m disturbed because that seemed very stigmatizing and prejudiced either way yet it was accepted as appropriate . . . I hear how difficult people with bipolar are frequently, like we are 10 to 100 times more difficult than other people just because of our illness. Can you please offer any insight so I can stop feeling like a plague on humanity?
I read this question, and I was pretty much incensed.
Dealing with Bipolar Prejudice and Stigma at Work
There are really two questions in the above. One is what to do when hearing stigmatizing and prejudicial remarks at work, and the other is about how “difficult” we are to work with.
Now, if you happen to be “out” at work as a person with bipolar disorder, I would be tempted to say something to the trainer like, “Really? Because I’m a pleasure to work with.” (I’m not unmedicated, but I think the point still stands.)
That would pretty much make the trainer swallow their tongue, I’d wager.
(And just in case anyone is unclear, just saying “unmedicated” doesn’t make it any less wrong.)
However, most people are not “out” in their workplace, and people don’t know they have bipolar disorder. In that case, I think it’s entirely appropriate to say pretty much what the reader above said, like so:
“I find that to be a blanket statement that can’t possibly be true, is stigmatizing and pre-judges people with a mental illness unfairly.”
Now, I know those words might be difficult to form as sometimes it’s hard to stand up for ourselves, but, damn it, if we don’t stand up for ourselves, then who will? And just consider for a moment that you’re not the only person in that room with bipolar disorder. Consider that someone else is sitting there and internalizing that bullshit. Think about the gift you are giving that person by standing up to the prejudice and stigma of that statement. It’s a gift that’s worth putting yourself out there a little to give.
Are People with Bipolar More Difficult to Work With?
This falls under the give-me-a-fucking-break category. Are people with bipolar disorder harder to work with? Well, I’d wager that some are hard to work with and some aren’t – kind of like the rest of the population, but is the mental illness the determining factor? No, of course, it isn’t.
And not to put too fine a point on it, but I make a living working with all sorts of clients every day, and if I wasn’t easy to work with, I would find myself not able to pay my rent. And, just in case you were wondering, I work very closely with and for another person with bipolar disorder, and she’s a delight to work with. Is she more difficult? I’d say she’s less difficult than many of the people I’ve worked with in my lifetime. (Try working with Microsofties for a while. Now they’re challenging but not exactly in the DSM.)
Sweeping Prejudicial Statements about Bipolar are Never True
When it comes down to it, any time someone makes a sweeping generalization about bipolar disorder or any mental illness, it isn’t true. It couldn’t possibly be. We are individuals, and our mental illnesses do not define who we are or what we do. Some of us work at gas stations, some of us work at software companies, and some of us are mouthy mental health writers. We’re different. Like everyone else.
And while I completely understand why a person with bipolar might feel like a plague on humanity (I’ve felt it too), we have to remember that feeling is just because of the prejudice that other people are spouting against people with bipolar disorder. It’s our job to be strong, stand up to that prejudice and not internalize other people’s hatred. Because we deserve better than that. We demand better than that. And we will create better than that in every conversation where we don’t stand for that crap.
If you’re interested in the topic of mental illness in the workplace, check out my podcast: Snap Out of It! The Mental Illness in the Workplace Podcast with Natasha Tracy.
Here’s another article I recently found that goes into a bit more detail
https://www.google.ca/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/careers/careers-blog/working-bipolar-life-secrecy-shame-mental-health
It’s extremely important to monitor and manage your stess levels early. I know because it’s often a trigger for me that can lead to a major episode .
At times I’ve had to request a transfer to a different job or location within the organization. At other times I’ve had to take a bit of time off to sort myself out and get myself back on track again
The key is to deal with it early. You definately don’t want to get so far down that rabbit hole that you have to take a ton of time off to climb your way back up again. Ultimately the longer you’re off the more time someone else has to learn and potentially master your job which can work against you in the long run by creating stiff competition
I feel very fortunate to still be working after 40 years for the same organization. In my humble opinion there will always be a certain amount of stigma and predjudice in the workplace and even beyond be it either overt or convert.
My advice to you’all, that is if you truly want to keep a job, and not limit your opportunities, is to always keep your mouth shut in public about your mental health issues and use extreme caution even with those closest to you outside of work.
It’s a surprisingly small world as they say and
people have a tendency to gossip which often spreads like wildfire throughout an entiire office and sometimes even through entire organizations. You certainly don’t want it to reach the ears of someone within your organization who has the power to make or break your career.
That’s why I say it’s always best to just focus on getting yourself as well as you can and in the utmost discrete manner possible. Don’t give them any ammunition that they could conceivably use against you.
Yes there laws against such things but most employers are adept at finding ways around them, such as through downsizing, etc
I only wish I could face bipolar issues at work. I havent worked for 20 years. It was and still is that bad. I was always in high stress positions and that really did me in.
I have bipolar disorder and I have only been hard to work with, because of bipolar disorder, a few times. People are hard to work with at different times for many reasons – they’re tired, stressed, worried, angry, etc. I really don’t think I was harder to work with than any other human. I have worked through some serious episodes and there have only been a couple of times when my episode affected my work. Now that I am doing better in my recovery, I think I am probably easier to work with than the average person because I don’t assume that I am always right. I have accepted the fact that I’m not perfect, I’m human. I make mistakes, feel annoyed, angry, etc,, but I don’t always act on my feelings. I take time to reflect on situations before deciding what to do. This is what I have learned from therapy. I have gotten really good about thinking carefully before I speak and act.
I have to say to just clam up when it comes to telling your boss or fellow co-workers about bipolar. In my experience; no good comes from it and I feel sad enough about having bipolar without people I work with shutting me out. Yes, I am a coward – I don’t stand up for myself, but what amazes me is – I would defend anyone who has a mental illness. What a world.
Psychiatrics had think that they can spread evil theorys forewer…because its not psychiatrys who are ewil..like nazi;s themself was not evil nor hitler…but theory which they beleaved us sciance was evil…so its similar with psychiatrics..in innermost they may not be evil..but because practice that theory they practice its evil…like theory (eugenism…theory made by pschiatrics and proclamed be scintific and for that reason hitler and ss beleaved a psychiatrics that its nesseessory destroy a jews..that menttal ilness does not spread…so hitler was a victim of school medicin…which print all short of bussness theorys and pronanciate to be sciance..
So most of psychiatrics are victim themself…because they beleave us psychiatrics who teach a hitler…whot to do for menttall illness..and like in geman menttall ilness was on they eyes who wach a jew us today its same…menttall ilness are like.beayty of those eyes who are waching..
So psychiatrics are victims of wrong education and unable for the brainash to realise reality that brutality of the theory comes from medical factory who its has done so brutal and human trade way…and lack of any sympaty towards wictims…patient..whom they trade to psychiatrics indastry to be a drugs slave…which cannot be any beifit…how to person who have no medical/labs pase reason to use dobba or serotonin blockers ore stimulants…how the person can benifit any medicin which are not pase of labs…
Plas they are werry dishonest with a side effect…so its seems by hat that they are purposefully manipulative and hide a side effects for penifits of medical factory…thats only they are educated do..profit..profit..profit..whot way? It does not bathers them..wheter its compolsory..or manipulation..used for trffiking of people to be slave of medical factory and psychiatrics indastry.
OK Malle,
You’ve had your say, now please move on.
– Natasha
I keep psychiatrics like horoscope makers…you can say to mosta of people they have depresson and sometimes not..so they are bipolr….am I right?
But whot is griminal that they use compolsory treatment and forse a people beleave them..and blackmale of wiktims..and kidnap them from home…because they beleave a horoscope they have made to others..by this way psychiatrics deffer from other horoscope makers…
And they differ from other horoscope makesrs from that that they have similar power to kidnapt anyone from they home to getto…like kings in genelral in bible time…thats make. .Power whot thay have manipulate themself..that make them werry dangerous people….so that kniwing people do not newer say whot they think for psychiatrys and it gives psychiatrys false feeling ” they brutal bractise are liked..no…anyone exept masokist cant injoy they practise…they are last king…who have a mighty pover prison whom they want to.. So world has not devoloped from bible time at all..there still among us a peoples who have a same power than kings in bible time they are psychiatrics…
I dont thinks thats normal…but all sosiaty has been prepared for human trade tehey do sell people to med.factory…so they have manipulate all power of themself..and they use it like stalin..or other horrible power keepers..stalin. They bring people to getto..when they want to and whom they want to..
So all they are evil..because they use power like stalin..or hitler. .And explane like hitler or stalin..why…only reason are brutality..
Amang of psychiatrics are delutional people…because whole theory its delusion..and ewery sinle sentence and labell had produse in medical factory…and who ewer beleaves a it are the trater..because psychiatrics must. Calate how much they produse a monay to medical factory for year…so when ewer they labell a person they must calculate..how much that person will bring monay to madical factory…so latelly even psychiatrics undestand that they have anyhow educated in a way that they bring multitude..beong multitude billions to medical factory…and realise themself that whole theory has made by medical factory…and they are human traders who are masked to be helper……like human trader labell themself..
There is no good psychiatry exist…because theory it evil..
But there are multitude of psychiatrics who does not realise any evil practice…because they are faroff
First rule of being bipolar; don’t tell anyone you are bipolar except those you can trust. Why tell co-workers, or your boss you are mentally ill… If you have some sort of major episode which causes you to get fired, then so be it.. leave. You could play it down to being stressed out, but saying you’re mentally ill is a much longer lasting stigma which can effect any other job opportunities in terms of references from previous employment.
On the upside, one could make a HUGE amount of money from sueing workplace after workplace for discrimination, which is pandemic. As far as I can tell, this is pretty much the only way for a person with mental illness to accumulate wealth and I might add that it would be a sure-fire way to accumulate wealth too (not that i’m seriously recommending it!).
It’s fun trying to work with other therapists. One colleague disclosed her depression to me, long before I realised I was ill. What a great lady. She now serves as a role model for me, I just need to remember her to get a bit of confidence.
Others are very good. I had an attempt at going back to work but it was too much. My boss and colleagues were really great and supportive.
On the other side, the stigma among some mental health workers is rank. One work reentry that I tried was a nightmare born entirely of attitude. The clients in that facility were in permanent lock up and it was full on psychological warfare between the different groups and their opinions. When they discovered my as yet undiagnosed impairment, I became an object of that warfare. Most education three weeks I spent. I was finally asked to leave.
Working at a ‘gas station’ was much friendlier. A lot of employees had various problems keeping them out of the mainstream professional workplace. People who had less knowledge wrote my diagnosis off as something they didn’t understand. I was treated like a real person – but that also meant struggling to keep my roster steady,
When I say “rank” I mean it stinks.
I have Bipolar, diagnosed and I work within the MH system, as a administrative. I can tell you from my personal experience, disclosing and/or divulging to your employer(s) that you have a mental illness of any description is NOT a good idea.
My last psych IP was in 2006 while I worked the front desk of a local MH clinic. I actually had a breakdown of sorts and struggled with psychosis. Meanwhile, little did I know till later… the entire staff of the clinic had been watching me for several weeks and discussing my “mental state”.
After I returned to work, a month later, from my last psych IP… you would’ve thought I had the Plague. No one talked to me, unless business dictated and my clinic director sat me in the farthest back room behind a door. Which, at the time, was great but I came to learn… it was to hide me. None of the clinicians, for which I had worked alongside for nearly 2 years up till that point… spoke to me outside of business speak… NO ONE.
In 2011, I disclosed again… to yet another MH providing agency. I disclosed that and my seizure disorder. All was good, at first, until they decided to place me in a position – due to downsizing – that stressed me out to no end. So, I asked for an accommodation and the next thing I know… I’m laid off, due to program closure and my fellow admins stopped talking TO ME and instead, AT ME.
So, I no longer tell a soul… not a soul for which I’m employed with or alongside of. I just suffer silently while I hear the stigmatization coming from certain members of the MH profession that should know better but do not. I still work within a MH agency world, but I never utter a word of myself.
My question is, what are the qualifications of this trainer and where did he or she come from? The thought that this person is going around and misinforming people makes me angry. So many of us are doing our best to educate others about what various mental illnesses are and are not, and then someone like that comes along and undoes whatever progress we might have achieved……..it is unacceptable, and just plain wrong.
Natasha,
As incensed as you may be, it is quite different for a male.
There is no place for a male with mental illness except behind bars.
I’ve become an invalid, and had to live with my family until they passed.
I admire your fighting spirit, but they just take us down with tasers.
No Hope will be lost for you however, if you can get someone highly visible for your plight like Catherine Zeta-Jones.
Please pursue your passion as many peoples born in these last few generations will be medicated.
It is always a razor’s edge, and I do and must take medication daily.
My main job is to remain stable.
Please reply when time permits.
May all that is Good in This Universe assist you on your quest for hope and understanding.
Sincerely,
Burt B.
Hi Burt,
I don’t understand what you’re saying. Why is it different for a man than for a woman? A woman could easily be in your shoes.
– Natasha Tracy
Hi Natasha,
I guess what I’m really trying to say is that my spirit is broken, yet you have a fighting chance.
Forgive me.
I have seen many women incarcerated for no apparent reason also.
— Burt B.
Btw, Natasha, have you written an article about telling your boss, telling a bf/gf, telling your family you have a mental illness? I think all of these are interesting subjects, and there’s definitely a right or wrong way to do it!
I’ve written a few things on telling people you have a mental illness.
Do I have to tell people I have a mental illness: http://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/breakingbipolar/2013/03/have-tell-people-bipolar/
How do I tell my parents I need mental health help? http://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/breakingbipolar/2012/04/how-do-i-tell-my-parents-i-need-mental-health-help/
Telling your family you have a mental illness: http://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/breakingbipolar/2012/02/telling-your-family-you-have-a-mental-illness-you-are-not-ok/
Talking to others about your mental illness: http://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/breakingbipolar/2011/01/talking-to-others-about-your-mental-illness/
When do I tell my boyfriend/girlfriend I have a mental illness: http://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/breakingbipolar/2011/08/when-do-i-tell-my-boyfriendgirlfriend-i-have-bipolar-disorder/
And there are probably others :)
– Natasha Tracy
Unfortunately this issue goes father than the workplace. The media reporting on crimes by “mentally ill people” also contributes to this stigma. We’re created the supposedly ubiquitous threat of “mental illness!” Most non-afflicted people are only taught to fear it, not understand it. Can you think of a lot of celebrities that are bipolar (and I don’t mean “crazy” musicians)? Richard Dreyfuss, Catherine Zeta Jones…umm, drawing a blank? I’m sure other actors have disorders, they just can’t admit it while maintaining a good image, which is sad. Mental illness is used as a tool for sensationalism unfortunately. A small percentage of people with mental illness commit crimes, and they’re not more likely to do so just because of the illness. People fear the unknown, I think. It certainly sells stories. And that’s the root of discrimination…
We really should open the discussion and revise the common perspective. Society needs to stop acting like mentally ill people don’t want to be held to normal standards. Everyone ultimately wants to be included, not treated poorly due to a stigma. Give people a chance to be “normal” and functional after humbling themselves and receiving treatment.
I’m just going to say it, and I’m sure someone is going to jump all over this comment – it is so hard to stand up for something that you absolutely hate. I cannot detach myself from this feeling. I know intellectually that this is not helpful, but I cannot seem to change this feeling no matter how much logic, CBT, etc. that I throw at it. I’ve certainly stood up for people in the past, but it is easier to be objective about the plight of others and hard as hell to be that way with yourself. It is also difficult to hear your own singular, lone voice within a cacophany of negative comments – especially when you’re feeling especially worthless and your own mind is adding to this negative cesspool and telling you it makes perfect sense. Sometimes the weight of those comments is just too heavy a weight to bear no matter how strong you are. And I don’t think or see myself as a weak person. If I were to flashback to many past occassions, there are many situations that completely support this. But I don’t feel like this all the time, and especially not after freaking months of depression… About what? I don’t know and have been trying to figure this out. And you tell me that depression is not real? Acceptance…that’s all you have to say? I suppose only time will tell…Will it? I HATE it when people toss the word acceptance around. Like it’s a treat tossed to a dog – something swallowed, something to be grateful for. I feel terrible saying this. I try not to allow myself to think of it because if I did, I would break down and cry. I am crying now, dammit! It is still happening! Time is silent.
Hi Judy,
Well, I’m not about to jump on your comment. I think what you’re expressing is real, heartfelt and you’re not alone in feeling it. I shall tell a little story:
When I was in high school I was very outspoken about the rights of gays (because I grew up in a white, Christian, small-minded little place). I thought some of the things that were going on in my community were wrong and I said so, publicly in our school newspaper and in public forums.
But then I realized I was bisexual and the rules all changed. Suddenly I couldn’t stand up for the rights of gays because I _was_ one and standing up for myself was more than I could bear (for many reasons). I felt the need to live in that closet and felt that public remarks would lead people to believe I _was_ gay and there _was_ something wrong with me, in spite of the fact that I believed, whole-heartedly, that there was nothing wrong with being gay.
So I’m saying, it’s complicated. And it’s more so when your brain is involved because on top of whatever psychological issues you might have around it, you also have all the bad signals coming from your brain.
So don’t feel terrible. What you’re experiencing is normal. People have their own paths and take their own time to get to a place of acceptance. https://natashatracy.com/bipolar-disorder/acceptance-bipolar-disorder-process/
Don’t beat yourself up just because you’re in the middle of the acceptance process. It’s okay. We’ve all been there.
I’m sorry you’re crying, but try to remember you’re not alone. I got through that rough patch in the acceptance of my sexuality and, of course the acceptance of my mental illness too. You will too, but it takes time. Give yourself that time and space.
– Natasha Tracy
Without going into the whole sad yarn, there are definitely other factors that makes acceptance difficult. Some circumstances simply make this process harder. As you shared your tale, it triggered my memory…
I met two HIV positive men in a training program. One seemed to thrive despite his health status. The other, who definitely had an edge in moving forward in this particular program, did not. I got to know both of them, and ever so curious, i wondered why two men in the same circumstance had such different outlooks. The one who thrived admitted to having lots of bad moments, but he also had good moments that helped him build new levels of healing. He was also fortunate to have support, acceptance, and love from his loved ones. Mind you, this was in the 80s – when this illness first appeared on the scene, was greatly feared, and information about it very limited. You would’ve never guessed that he was at one point so ill and close to death. The other did not have those natural alternations of good and bad. His circumstances simply went from bad to worse. He lost his partner of 10 years to AIDS almost immediately and was overcome by grief. His business partner decided to take advantage of his misfortune by squeezing him out of the business, leaving him strapped financially and struggling to pay for medical care. He lost his home. He couldn’t work for some time. His family completely abandoned him out of shame. Needless to say, he was pretty depressed and difficult to be around. Life circumstances beat his spirit down and the only way he could keep up the fight was to become angry. Now, I’m pretty patient, and I have a pretty good understanding of how difficult life can be. I don’t distinguish one pain as being worse than another. Pain is pain. But even I couldn’t stand being around him after a while. He insulted me one day, so I basically told him to stop calling me. I received a very nice christmas card a few months later. I called him back. I never heard from him again because, sadly, he passed away.
His illness and life eventually wore him down.
The moral of the story? Being sick is hard. Shitty circumstances on top of that makes it even harder. Shitty people adding more shitty circumstances makes it unbearable. Life is a series of good and bad, and without those alternations, there is no healing.
Sorry, I’m just venting. I appreciate your kind words and will read the linked article. Thank you.
Very timely,
I started back to work 3 weeks ago. The job is OK but, my co-workers (who are health care professionals by the way), don’t have a clue what to say to me. I am developing a certain empathy for them for their ignorance. At first, I was disappointed and sad at their odd behaviour now, I feel that I have something to teach them. Everyday gets a little better and hopefully soon they will realize that bipolar is not some communicable disease. I will do this with grace and dignity.
I now regret letting my boss know about my bipolar 11. It seems as though I am being observed like she and my colleagues are waiting for the next breakdown.
Hi Lydia,
In all honestly, I usually advise people not to tell their employers. Sometimes it works out, but more often than not it results in unfortunately consequences like the ones you are experiencing. Unfortunately, no matter how good a job we do, some people will always let their own prejudices dictate their behaivor.
My only suggestion for you is maybe to educate your boss about bipolar disorder. Maybe recommend a site she could read or bring her a print out of something you think would help educate her. She might not read it and it might not help, but then again, she may, and it may.
Remember, knowledge dispels fear and removing fear removes stigma and prejudice so I default to education when people aren’t treating me well.
– Natasha Tracy
My opinion is based on 40 years in Mental Health and 28 of those specializing in Employee Assistance in global Fortune 500 and medical settings. That trainer was not only way put of line, wrong and inappropriate, but also subjecting self and customer to risk of legal exposure. Diagnostic labeling is as unfair and inappropriate as racial and gender labeling. It has no place in any training. His comment about “unmedicated ” is a weak coverup for a major error in judgment and conduct. If working for me, that trainer would be lucky to have a job. I would most likely terminate such a person, who should know better. There is no factual foundation to his comment; it’s just plain wrong. I think you demonstrated great tact in how you confronted him. He would have fared much worse if he made that comment in my presence.
Thank you, Steven. If only more people were as educated and open-minded as you. I agree with some former comments [above] that until people of notoriety or of high profile begin to openly wake people up about this [bipolar] disorder and others, the public, a a whole, in its complacency, will continue to wallow blithely in their ignorance. I love the lyric from rock drummer, from the band Rush, who penned these true lines: “Quick to judge, quick to anger, slow to understand…Ignorance and prejudice, and fear walk hand in hand.”